Entries in 2010 (1)


A Little Reflection For The End Of The Year

Image by Gestures PhotographyI stumbled across this project last week and right away wanted to join in, both for myself and to share with all of you. It’s called Reverb10. Through a series of daily prompts participants are encouraged to reflect on the past year and share their stories. There are close to 3,000 people writing as a part of this project. The posts are being shared through Twitter and Delicious. I encourage you to poke around, read a little and maybe even join in yourself.

Since I’m coming to this a little late in the game I’m going to jump around and pick the prompts that speak to me most. So for my first reverb10 post I’m combing #1 - One Word and #3 - Moment.

This year has been an amazingly Transformative year, however that’s not the word I would use to encapsulate it. Instead I would use Trust. The numerous changes that happened this year all came about because I trusted. I trusted that I had support, that I had the knowledge, that my feeling was right.

I’ll start at the beginning to give you a scope of what manifested. In January I took a 14-week class in which I wrote the business plan for Lightbox SF and started acting on those plans while still in the process of finishing it. In June I left a business I had been working on making successful for the last 3 years. It just wasn’t working and I needed to let go. That same month I moved out of my apartment for the last 7 years and into an apartment with a man I had met only 6 months before. The last two weeks of August brought the biggest deluge of change. I quit my “day job” to work on Lightbox SF full time, accepted a proposal for marriage and turned 35.

I tend to be a worrier and a planner. I don’t like uncertainty and I hate the thought of failure. So you can imagine that every one of these leaps, that’s what they all were, scared me to death. I did it anyway because somewhere in the last few years I learned to trust not only that things would work out, but also that I was capable of making it all happen.

There is one moment that comes to mind bringing all those leaps together. It is the first 200 Yards opening in mid-August. We had a great turnout; people were excited about the concept and what it might turn into. The photos looked amazing on the wall and I had such a sense of accomplishment that we had made this happen. My boyfriend (he wasn’t my fiancé yet) was there not only to support me, but as one of the photographers in the show. It was a great night. I felt a part of something great and optimistic that things would only go up from here. I had a week left in my day job and I was going to make this thing work.

The last few months of this year have taught me even more. I have worked on this dream called Lightbox SF. We’ve made some mistakes and seen things turn out differently than we hoped or planned. We’ve also seen some amazing things happen. People coming out of nowhere excited about what we’re doing and willing to help in anyway they could. Ideas that seemed so simple turned into amazing new paths for us to explore. I have to keep trusting as we have a long road still ahead of us, but that first butterflies-in-the-stomach inducing leap is over with and we came up swimming.

This next year, 2011, I hope to look back on many nights like that first opening and have a hard time choosing what was the best. I also want the word that comes to mind to be Success. I want all my trust to manifest itself in the goals I set for myself and to allow me to succeed at each one.

Look back on this last year, what word or image comes to mind first? How would you sum it all up?